More Thoughts...

I wanted to post about something that I have been giving a lot of thought about. I know that sometimes in our church people see that women are ‘suppressed’ because we do not hold the priesthood. We are not among the brethren which must mean that we are not considered equal. Not only this, but sometimes the message from up top does no trickle down through the church on an individual level well. Some men belittle their wives and women in general because they think that it is allowed and perhaps even the way God made it. However, this is quite erroneous. If you doubt it I can refer you to a stinging talk by President Hinckley explaining the stance of this issue and those men in the church who treat their partners and women of the church as if we were less.

And the world says that the church is wrong in making us stay at home and tend to ‘lesser work.’ We as women hold office in the church. We as women are instructed to be educated as much as we can. This includes formal education but is not limited to formal education but is something that is asked that we keep doing throughout our lives. Better educated women make better mothers and the church knows this. I have come to understand our place in the church more because of my old calling. I would like to help explain what I know for my own record and for any of those who just want to know.

First, I would like to relate a story of something that happened to me while meeting with our ward’s bishopbric at their weekly meetings.

My bishop said, “Since Sister Smith is here with us we won’t kneel for the opening prayer.”

I quickly responded, “No, it is really okay, I can kneel.”

Bishop smiled and said, “No, we will not kneel.”

I said, “Really, I don’t mind.”

Bishop smiled again and nodded to proceed.

I was offended at first because I think of myself as a strong able woman. I am able to compete with any man because I am just as amazing. My arrogance and not understanding what the bishop was trying to do made me upset. When I relied this story to my husband he said, ‘man honey, you are so stubborn.’ Rude, but true.

After pondering this I have realized why the Bishop did what he did. He was setting an example for his young counselors on how women should be treated. Not only that, but how women are and should be respected in the church. After starting a lengthy study of old ensign/CES fireside talks by the brethren I have concluded that they hold women in a high place; perhaps even above themselves. They honor and respect women and recognize our abilities and strengths. By asking us not to kneel is not a blow to our gender but a boost. Do you see?

Here is my example from President Eyring that I would like you to consider.

“Many of us have wives of great abilities, great faith, and great forcefulness, and yet, in the Doctrine and Covenants the Lord seems to suggest that both the Prophet’s wife, Emma, and our own wives should be submissive. He says, ‘Continue in the spirit of meekness, and beware of pride. Let thy soul delight in thy husband, and the glory which shall come upon him.’

“How can a strong woman accept that? The Doctrine and Covenants seems to be answering that question specifically: ‘No power or influence can or ought to be maintained by virtue of the priesthood, only by persuasion, by longsuffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned; by kindness, and pure knowledge, which shall greatly enlarge the soul without hypocrisy, and without guile” (D&C 121:41-42)

“It would be hard to find a better marriage manual. Certainly the ablest, the most faithful, and the most forceful woman could feel confident in following a leader who, with love unfeigned, uses persuasion, kindness, and longsuffering.

“Winning the faith of children and wives will require not only a change of heart for many of us, but also the courage to endure. Even great fathers sometimes lose the faith of some of their families.”
(Because He First Loved Us, President Eyring, [167-168]).

And therein lays our strength. We choose to be led, which I think is the harder, higher calling. Led though, only when those specific guidelines are followed. We are a family unite—we should as a family pray about big decisions (jobs, moves, financial choices/investments) as a family. Then we will have the testimony of what we are doing as a family is correct.

Basically this all boils down to personal revelation. You need to have personal revelation about the role of women in the church so you can be strong against the opposing forces in this world. You need this on an individual basis because your trials come individually.